sad day

9 years ago on a Friday night I almost died.  I was driving north of Brady, Texas at dusk (otherwise known as the middle of nowhere).  I veered my truck in a lame attempt to dodge 2-3 deer who wanted to cross the road.  I not only managed to hit one of the deer but fliped my truck at least 4-5 times.

My left arm was bleeding pretty bad and I knew I was starting to experience shock.  As my vision faded in and out, the thing I remember most was just wanting to live.  There was no baragining with God or reflecting on how I had lived life - no pain, no fear - just a desire to live.

Eventually, I had to be cut out of the truck and had to be taken to the hospital.  I had a fractured wrist, 2nd-3rd degree "road rash" burns on my left arm and hand and had over 40 stitches.  I was blessed to make it out so nicely.  I was happy to be alive and trying to figure out what it all "meant".

I was a full-time graduate student and a part time substitute teacher so I didn't have to go to work and had no plans to work for at least a week. Having experienced my own existential crisis on Friday made Tuesday all the more real and emotional.

Tuesday morning, my mom woke me up (I was living with my parents) to tell me a plane had hit one of the World Trade Center towers. This was still very early so the media was still trying to figure out if it was an accident.  Like everyone else, the rest of the day had me glued to the television like no other time before or since.

I had a class that night and reluctantly left home. As I drove to school I realized that we would probably bomb someone for this. I had already realized that's just what the murderers probably wanted. It was a test they knew we would fail.

Tonight I think back with regret and sadness for that day. I think back with a heavy heart to the toll that 9/11 took on the world.  Not only in its impact that day but for the foreign policy nightmare that started the very next day.

9 years later and hundreds of thousands more dead, we've seen more blood, violence and tears than we could have imagined at the time. Now we're saddled with the never-ending political football called "The War on Terror".

It's enough to make you cry all over again.