Sunday, June 3, 2018

Confucius Didn't Say That!: Pop Song Edition

It's time again to explore the deep, seedy under belly of the internet. No, not the "dark net" but FAKE CONFUCIUS QUOTES.

You see people love Confucius so much, they can't get enough of his treasures in the Analects, so they just start making up quotations from Confucius. Think of it like fan fic for ancient Chinese philosophy fans. In this post, you'll be treated to two fake quotes that I was recently delighted to discover. When I read this back-to-back (see below) they read like some terrible pop lyrics. So, I was inspired.

In fact, they were some of the top quotes offered up by the website Google.com. I highlighted them below.

Check it out, the top results for Confucius quotes only gets 10% accuracy on Google. Pathetic. Free cupcake if you can pick out the right one. Please email me ASAP at freecupcakeforconfucius@gmail.com to enter to win. No purchase necessary. Contest expires June 1, 2098. 


Quote #1: "Wheresoever you go, go with all your heart" - Confucius

Of all the quotes I have covered so far this is possibly the most obvious fake quote from Confucius.  Where to even begin?

First, I think the inclusion of 'Wheresoever" probably really impresses the common idiot. Like, it sounds so smart. Anyway, I digress. I have often repeated on the themes and style of Confucius and frankly, you can read it again over here.  Or you can trust me. Just trust me and let me walk you through this. Does this quote sound like it would come from the mouth of someone in China 2,500 years ago?

(No, no it doesn't if you're wondering)

Let's dig a little deeper into the word "heart" as seen in the Analects. As usual, I use Muller's translation . I am rather fond of his clarity and his helpful notes.

When you search the term "heart" you come up with these three quotations:

1:6: “A young man should serve his parents at home and be respectful to elders outside his home. He should be earnest and truthful, loving all, but become intimate with his innate good-heartedness. After doing this, if he has energy to spare, he can study literature and the arts.”

2:4  “At fifteen my heart was set on learning; at thirty I stood firm; at forty I was unperturbed; at fifty I knew the mandate of heaven; at sixty my ear was obedient; at seventy I could follow my heart's desire without transgressing the norm.”

 7:1 “I am a transmitter, rather than an original thinker. I trust and enjoy the teachings of the ancients. In my heart I compare myself to old Peng.”

There's another quote attributed to Yao (one of Confucius' followers) about "gain(ing) the people's trust" but that's it.

In Confucius' usage of the term "heart", there's nothing remotely similar to the quotation above, so I scrolled through 5 pages of Google to find who actually said this quotation. All I could find were endless Etsy pages trying to sell me more crap with this crap quote on it, I find it very unlikely someone transliterated an actual Confucius quote.

An aside about "heart".....

I suppose we should address the term "heart" before going any further. I did a little searching for the Chinese term translated by Muller as 'heart" but I am a little testy today, so I didn't dig that far. So, I am not 100% clear on the term "heart" as used by Confucius (via Muller). Furthermore, once I really started thinking about the term "heart" in English, I became a little unclear on the term as well. Is my heart different from my "soul"? Does the quote above refer to my authentic self or does it mean that I should remember compassion where ever I go?

There's a quote in the Analects that is somewhat similar but it's a stretch....

8:13: “Be of unwavering good faith and love learning. Be steadfast unto death in pursuit of the good Way. Do not enter a state which is in peril, nor reside in one which people have rebelled. When the Way prevails in the world, show yourself. When it does not, then hide. When the Way prevails in your own state, to be poor and obscure is a disgrace. But when the Way does not prevail in your own state, to be rich and honored is a disgrace.”

14:42: Zi Lu asked about the qualities of the noble man. Confucius said, “He cultivates himself by comforting others.”“Is that all?”“He cultivates himself by comforting everyone. Now, this is something that even Yao and Shun found difficult.”

Both quotes talk about a favorite theme of Confucius, which is consistency and the building of self-consistency and character.  In the first quote, Confucius is likely referencing the idea of the dao. The idea that "The Way" or the correct way is a natural one, that man is often out of harmony with the dao but can learn and work to achieve harmony with, though self-cultivation. Again, it's a bit of a stretch but the whole idea is that you take "it" with out, no matter what.

The second quote, I took as addressing the more "compassionate heart" definition. That one who takes his or her heart with her everywhere will be able to comfort those in need, wherever they may be.

I can't find who originally said this lame quote and I don't care, like I said, I'm a little salty tonight.


I mean, sure take your heart everywhere you go but don't forget to brush your teeth and look both ways before you cross a street while you're at it.

This is an utterly forgettable quote, it's fluff surrounded by Styrofoam peanuts. No one can disagree with it and it reveals nothing about life that you didn't already know. The quote sucks and Confucius didn't say it. 



Quote # 2: "I want you to be everything that's you, deep at the center of your being" - Confucius 

Let me just start by saying I simultaneously hate and love this fake Confucius quote. It's so ludicrous and yet I think I smiled when I first read it. Both of these quotes read like obscenely bad "boy band" lyrics.

It may seem obvious if you know anything about Confucius, but to be clear, Confucius would not use the term "deep at the center of your being". Nor do I think he would even know what that means. In fact, I have no idea what that means, although I have a strong belief, it's likely just some new-age mumbo-jumbo.

What I think is really going on here gets at the heart of this whole project, which reveals Western attitudes and beliefs about ancient China, Confucius and to a lesser extent, modern China.

My guess is most Americans can't name one specific fact about Confucius other than he is from China and wise. That said, Americans that had some idea about who Confucius was might describe him as wise, elegant, noble and exotic. There would be significant overlap with American beliefs of Buddha as well. Therefore, mysterious, quasi-spiritual, wise-sounding quotes seem to fit the bill to most Americans as "Confucian sounding" or even "Buddha sounding".

Confucius never said anything that could be remotely considered "new age". So, let's first unpack the quote itself. 

I understand this quote to be about being your authentic self, no matter the circumstances. The assumption is that humans are "centered" when we are our true selves. If we are centered, we will be better people to our friends, families, co-workers, etc.

The idea of an authentic self would be a foreign concept to Confucius and most ancient people. This belief stems from an individualistic, Western preoccupation with one's self.  One of an individual's major life goals is to find self-actualization. In fact, my culture says that "finding myself" and isn't really selfish, but necessary for me, even if it hurts others. Being an American, I am somewhat sympathetic to this perspective, but I can also see its glaring faults and excesses as well. 

Confucius would condemn any outlook that emphasizes personal fulfillment above that of others. In fact, it is in suppressing one's own self that makes one righteous. 

1:6: The Master said: “A young man should serve his parents at home and be respectful to elders outside his home. He should be earnest and truthful, loving all, but become intimate with his innate good-heartedness. After doing this, if he has energy to spare, he can study literature and the arts.”

(Didya notice I just used this quote twice in the same blog post? If so, give yourself a good slap on the back, smarty pants!)


In a Confucian system, the individual situates oneself in vertical relationships. Vertical relationships are based on knowing one's place in that relationship. When operating correctly, society moves in harmony. When there is disorder, it stems first from the household and then outward.  While one's parents come first, this same attitude extends to interpersonal relations (10:12) and later as the individual operates in larger society (12:2).

10:12: When the ruler would send a gift of cooked food, he would always sit straight and first taste it; if the ruler sent uncooked meat, he would always cook it and offer it to others; when the ruler presented him with a live animal, he would always rear it. When attending at a meal for the ruler, after the ruler makes the sacrifice, he is first to eat it. 

[12:2] Zhong Gong asked about the meaning of ren. The Master said: “When you are out in the world, act as if meeting an important guest. Employ the people as if you were assisting at a great ceremony. What you don't want done to yourself, don't do to others. Live in your town without stirring up resentments, and live in your household without stirring up resentments.”


Once again I am stumped on who said this in the first place. I had never seen this quote before tonight and I am pretty sure I would have noticed it before. That said, the oldest link I could find was from a Yahoo Answers from 2011. Maybe it's that person's fault.

Even devoid of attributing the quote to someone famous or wise, this is an awful little proverb. 

Actually, it's beyond awful, it's terrible.  Try this one instead, it's a "teacher-based" quote but true nonetheless.

 [15:16] The Master said: “If a man doesn't continually question, ‘What is it? What is it?’I don't know what I can do for him.”

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